Anyway, where before Dave and I would fill our weekends with various projects around the house, now we share baby duty and we are not quite as productive as we used to be. So often when one of us is going out, we coordinate errands and trips to save time and gas. A few weeks ago, I was headed out to a consignment sale and Dave asked me stop at the hardware store and pick him up some clear silicone caulk. An easy task that was on my way so I, of course, agreed.
Entering Lowe's, I forgot how huge the capacity of the store was and how tiny the item I needed in comparison. Having a lifetime of experience with caulk from being the daughter of an HVAC man (and now daughter-in-law too), I thought about the various departments in the store it might be found. After speed walking through the store to two of these locations, I decided to ask a sales associate to save time.
"OK, how should I phrase this question so I don't say something comically offensive?" I thought to myself. An older gentleman wearing a Lowe's vest came into my line of vision and I flagged him down quickly and asked.
"Excuse me sir, can you tell me where I can find the cauuuulk?" Never has someone enunciated those syllables in quite the same heavy on the "u" manner.
Perplexed at what in the hell I was talking about he asked, "do you mean the caulking?"
Damn! Caulking! I hadn't even thought to add an "ing" to the end of the word to avoid any perverse confusion. He said the word so quickly and effortlessly! Like the word was not a big deal if your mind was not that of a 13 year old boy. Oh well, I'd rather be thought of as that poor girl with an unfortunate speech impediment than a pervert.